So do you want to hear the incredibly dumb story that goes along with the dumbest injury ever?
Well, lucky for you I wish for others to be as entertained by my mishaps as I am, so I'm more than willing to share. But I'm warning you, its the dumbest injury story ever.
So I managed to survive the 1000 mile trek across the middle of America, including the worst ice storm I have ever driven through. I even made some new friends along the way (this is a totally random yet entertaining story for another time). So as is custom when one makes new friends in Colorado, one goes skiing with said new friends. So there I am standing in my first lift line of the day, having skied one run down to a mid-mountain lift. I queue up with the mob of humanity that is also skiing over the holiday week and decide that I've got plenty of time to mess with my boots.
Now a little about my boots, for those not in the know....I have MAJOR boot issues. And by major I mean I have been known to stop mid run and demand assistance with the adjusting and re-buckling of my boots lest I find a chainsaw and cut off my leg because that seems like a better option than continuing to ski with the boots as they are.
Have you ever tried to mess with boots (yours or someone elses) in the middle of a fairly steep run? Its not easy kids. And I have "a guy" that had become quite good at dealing with my mid-mountain boot issues....but he wasn't on this trip....so I decided that there in that lift line would be a much better place to get my boot fit dealt with than somewhere mid-run with my new mountain-friend who would no doubt have little patience for such boot hi jinks.
So there I am in the lift line...as in, standing still, on flat ground...bending and contorting and trying to snap down my boot buckle, when I feel a pop.
Ow. That hurt.
Then I pole forward in the line.
Ow. That really hurt.
I try to shake it off. There is no way I just got hurt buckling my boot. I mean really.
But four days later I was trying to hunt down a Chiropractor outside of Aspen that wasn't going to charge me a mortgage payment to shove my rib back into place.
Turns out I managed to displace the little guy while doing the oh-so-strenuous task of boot bucking. How's that for an extreme mountain girl injury? Oh, but bonus, I may have also torn some of the rib's little ligament friends so it could stay irritated for even longer. Oh the joy.
Have you ever injured a rib? Let me tell you its shockingly painful in the most annoying way. I mean, its a rib for cryin' out loud, not a femur. WHY DOES IT HURT SO BAD? And when I say hurt, I mean like if I breathe too deep its like someone is stabbing me in the heart through my armpit. A sneeze? OMG like the whole side of me is exploding.
So I went and got all adjusted and guess what...it still hurts. And will probably still hurt for another week. And I paid $95 for that to happen?! So consider me back on the ibuprofen. Well, tomorrow that is. Right now I'm testing the effectiveness of a nice bottle of California Zinfandel.